You’ve done everything right: invested in courses, learned the proven self-promotion frameworks, followed those who promise that if you just post consistently, use the right hooks, and show up authentically, the clients will come.
But every time you sit down to promote your business, something stops you.
You write a post about your services and delete it, you draft an email announcing your offer and let it sit in your drafts for weeks. You know you should be talking about what you do more, but the thought of it gives you a sinking feeling in your stomach.
It’s not because you don’t know what to say, it’s because self-promotion feels terrible. And no amount of “just do it anyway” advice makes it feel any better.
I know this because I’ve spent 10 years working with service entrepreneurs as a personal development coach before I became a copywriter.
And here’s what I’ve learned: the best marketing strategy in the world won’t work if promoting yourself makes you want to hide under a rock.
Let me show you why self-promotion feels so hard, and more importantly, how to fix it.
In this post:
- The Self-Promotion Problem No One Talks About
- The 3 Biggest Mindset Blocks Talented Entrepreneurs Face
- What happens when you fix your self-promotion mindset
- The 3 mindset shifts that make self-promotion easier
- How to Actually Fix Your Self-Promotion Mindset (without toxic fake positivity)
- FAQ: Common questions about mindset and self-promotion
TL;DR
Self-promotion feels hard because of three mindset blocks: undervaluing your worth, fear of being “too salesy,” and worrying you’ll look like a fraud. These aren’t marketing problems but belief problems.
Once you shift your mindset (stop waiting for permission, embrace discomfort as growth, and believe in what you’re saying), promoting yourself gets easier.
This post breaks down exactly how to make those shifts so you can finally show up, charge what you’re worth, and stop hiding.
The Self-Promotion Problem No One Talks About
Most marketing advice focuses on tactics: post three times a week, use this caption formula, optimize your website for conversions.
But tactics don’t work when you’re:
- Deleting what you really want to say because you’re afraid it sounds too salesy
- Lowering your prices because you think “people will never pay that much”
- Over-explaining your services because you’re worried people won’t “get it”
- Posting and immediately hiding your phone because you can’t handle the anxiety of putting yourself out there
Sound familiar?
That’s not a marketing problem. That’s a mindset problem.
And until you fix your mindset, no amount of “better copy” or “more consistent posting” is going to make self-promotion feel easier.
The 3 Biggest Mindset Blocks Talented Entrepreneurs Face
Here’s the truth that’s hard to swallow: you don’t hate self-promotion because you’re humble or because you don’t want to be pushy.
You hate it because something inside you is convinced that promoting yourself will make people think less of you and judge you.
Let me break down the three biggest mindset blocks that make self-promotion feel impossible.
1. The “Who Am I to Charge That Much?” Block
You know what you do works. You’ve gotten results for clients, you’ve put in the hours, you have experience.
But when it comes time to write your sales page or send a proposal, you panic.
Cue the “Who am I to charge $3,000 for this?” “There are people out there who’ve been doing this longer than me.” “What if they think I’m overpricing?”
So you lower your rates, add extra free bonuses, and undervalue your time because you’re more afraid of being seen as greedy than you are of being underpaid.
And here’s what happens: you attract clients who don’t value your work, you resent the projects you’re doing (even if you’re grateful), and you stay stuck at an income level that doesn’t match your expertise.
The fix is NOT to increase your prices, it’s believing you’re worth what you’re charging.
2. The “I Don’t Want to Be Salesy” Block
This one’s sneaky because it sounds noble. And I get it!
I definitely don’t want to sound salesy either, because I can’t stand fear-based and manipulative marketing tactics.
So in your head, it sounds like:
“I don’t want to be pushy.” “I want people to choose me because they want to, not because I convinced them.” “I’m just going to put it out there and see what happens.”
BUT!!! The truth is that if you’re aware of the “salesy” factor, it means it’s not in your nature to push…
So, really, what you’re really saying is: “I’m afraid that if I’m too direct about what I offer and why people need it, they’ll reject me.”
You therefore post vague content, rarely mention your services and you “soft launch” (which is code for “barely announce it and hope someone notices”).
And then you wonder why no one’s buying. Once again I get it, I’ve been there!
Here’s the truth: selling isn’t manipulation, it’s offering a clear solution.
There’s no such thing as being salesy when you:
- don’t manipulate,
- refuse to play on the fear of missing out (FOMO) in an unethical way (meaning, it’s ok to have a promo and announce the offer is expiring. But it’s not ok to make people feel ashamed if they’re not taking action, or to say the offer is expiring when it’s not…)
- don’t forcefully try to make people change their mind
You’re NOT too salesy, the problem is that you’re afraid of being seen as salesy so you’re not saying anything at all.
When you’re clear about what you offer, who it’s for, and why it works, you’re not being salesy. You’re being helpful, you’re making it easy for the right people to say yes.
3. The “What If I Don’t Look Legit?” Block
This is the big one. The one that keeps your best ideas in your drafts folder.
You write a post about what you really think. It’s bold, clear, vulnerable… The kind of thing that would make your ideal clients stop scrolling and say, “YES, this is exactly what I needed to hear.”
And then you delete it.
Because what if people disagree? What if they think you’re wrong or worse, a fraud? What if your aunt Karen comments something passive-aggressive and you have to see her at Thanksgiving?
So you post something safe and generic, something that won’t ruffle any feathers, something… FORGETTABLE.
And it gets zero engagement, because safe is vanilla…
Here’s what I want you to understand: the fear of being a fraud is costing you clients.
The people who need what you offer are looking for someone who has a clear point of view, who knows what works and isn’t afraid to say it, someone who sounds confident, even if they don’t feel confident 100% of the time.
When you water down your message to avoid judgment. You’re not protecting yourself, you’re hiding. And hiding doesn’t make sales. I know it because I was exactly where you are now.
What Happens When You Fix Your Self-Promotion Mindset
Let me tell you about one of my clients, a service entrepreneur who knew her offer was solid. She had the skills, the experience, the results.
But her messaging was not reflecting the value she was delivering because she was terrified of coming across as “too much” or sounding like she was bragging if she talked about her clients’ results.
We had a session on a Saturday afternoon. We didn’t talk about marketing tactics at this point, we talked about her false beliefs, money blocks, and the stories she’d been telling herself about why she couldn’t charge more, why people wouldn’t pay and why she had to keep proving herself.
By the end of the call, something shifted.
She sent a different kind of message to her list, not safer but bolder, more direct about what she offered and who it was for.
By Monday morning, she texted me: “Good news! In the last 24 hours I’ve made $2k woo hoo to money shifts! ❤️ thanks so much”
She didn’t learn a new marketing strategy, she cleared the mental block that was keeping her from showing up fully. Then she made her message clearer and bolder.
That’s the power of fixing your self-promotion mindset.
The 3 Mindset Shifts That Make Self-Promotion Easier
If you want self-promotion to stop feeling awful, you need to make these three shifts:
Shift 1: Stop asking “Will this work?” and start asking “What do I need to believe for this to work?”
Most entrepreneurs are stuck in a loop of trying new tactics, hoping one of them will finally be the thing that works.
But tactics don’t fail because they’re bad, they fail because you either don’t believe they’ll work for you or you force yourself to use a strategy that feels misaligned with your values.
Before you launch your next offer, write your next post, or send your next pitch, ask yourself these questions:
- “What would I need to believe about myself, my offer, and my audience for this to work?”
- “What do I make this mean about myself?”
- “Can I keep showing up no matter what?”
Then work on believing that, NOT by forcing, but by walking yourself through it and by taking action without giving up or wavering. Because once you do, the tactics start working.
Shift 2: Your discomfort is a sign you’re growing (not that you’re doing it wrong)
If posting about your services makes you uncomfortable, good. That means you’re pushing past the version of yourself that was playing small.
If talking about money makes you squirm, good. That means you’re confronting the beliefs that kept you undercharging.
If hitting “publish” on something bold makes your heart race, good. That means you’re doing something that matters.
Discomfort isn’t a red flag. It’s a green light. It means you’re moving in the right direction.
Shift 3: You don’t need permission to be the expert, you just need to start acting like one.
You’re waiting for someone to tell you you’re good enough, that you’ve earned the right to charge premium prices or that you’re allowed to position yourself as the go-to person in your field.
No one’s coming to give you that permission, you have to give it to yourself.
And the fastest way to do that? Start writing, speaking, and pricing like the expert you already are, even if it feels weird at first, even if you’re scared or if you think, “But I’m not there yet.”
You are. You just need to stop comparing yourself and focusing on what others think. Instead you need to start acting like you know what you’re doing (because you do).
How to Actually Fix Your Self-Promotion Mindset (without toxic fake positivity)
I’m not going to tell you to journal about abundance or repeat affirmations in the mirror. Those things can help some people, but they’re not enough. To be honest, affirmations have never worked for me.
If you want self-promotion to stop feeling like the hardest thing in business, you need to do two things:
1. Get real-time support when the blocks show up.
Mindset work isn’t something you do once and you’re done, it’s an ongoing process. Mindset blocks and false beliefs come up every time you’re about to do something that scares you.
When you’re about to publish a post and the voice in your head says, “This is not good, delete it”, you need someone in your corner saying, “No, this is good, here’s why, go ahead and hit publish, you got this!”
When you’re writing your About page and you keep watering it down because you’re afraid of sounding arrogant, you need someone to tell you, “You’re not being arrogant, you’re being clear and owning your expertise. Keep going!”
That’s why my copywriting coaching includes mindset support. Because I’ve learned that fixing the words without fixing the belief system behind them doesn’t work.
2. Practice acting like the limiting beliefs are gone (aka “do it anyway”).
If you want to book premium clients, you need to start writing and showing up like someone who books premium clients.
If you want to be seen as the go-to expert, you need to start positioning yourself as the go-to expert, even before it feels true.
I’m NOT telling you to fake it, because lying to yourself isn’t a good strategy (please don’t do that).
It’s about feeling the fear and doing it anyway, asking yourself “Who am I choosing to be right now?” “What would the version of myself who has seen my desired results do in this situation?”
And every time you do it, it gets easier. Until one day, it’s not scary anymore, it’s just a normal task.
Ready to Fix Your Self-Promotion Mindset (And Your Messaging)?
If you’ve been stuck in the cycle of tweaking your copy, second-guessing your posts, and wondering why promoting yourself feels like pulling teeth, it’s time to fix both the mindset AND the messaging.
That’s exactly what I do in my copywriting coaching programs.
You’ll get real-time feedback on your copy so you know exactly what to change, and when the fear, doubt, and imposter syndrome show up (and they will), we’ll tackle those in real-time too.
Because you don’t just need better words, you need to believe in those words enough to hit publish.
Copy Power Month (30 days) to fix your messaging fast so you can start booking more clients now. Save your spot, book here.
Copy Accelerator (3 months) for a complete messaging makeover with mindset support so you can finally increase your sales without doing more marketing. Apply here by booking your free call.
Let’s fix what’s really holding you back,
Morgane
Copywriter, Personal Development Coach & Business Strategist
FAQ: Mindset and Self-Promotion for Entrepreneurs
Why does self-promotion feel so uncomfortable?
Self-promotion feels uncomfortable because you’re wired to avoid rejection and judgment; it’s a defense mechanism. When you promote yourself, you’re putting your value on display and risking people saying no (or worse, saying nothing at all).
Your brain interprets this as a threat, which is why your stomach turns every time you hit publish. The discomfort is a sign you’re doing something vulnerable, and that takes practice to get comfortable with.
How do I know if mindset is my real problem or if my copy actually needs fixing?
If you’re spending hours tweaking the same post, deleting what you write, or avoiding talking about your services altogether, that’s mindset. If you’re hitting publish consistently but not getting responses, that might be a copy issue.
Most of the time, it’s both. You need messaging that works AND the confidence to use it without second-guessing yourself.
Can I really fix my mindset, or is this just how I am?
Your mindset isn’t fixed, it’s a set of beliefs you’ve had for years, most of the time since childhood (some of them aren’t even yours, but beliefs you’ve taken on from your care takers, friends, etc.).
You can change those beliefs, it won’t happen overnight, but every time you post and promote yourself despite the fear or increase your prices, you’re rewiring your brain. It gets easier the more you do it.
What if I fix my mindset but still don’t get clients?
You need both mindset and a messaging strategy. If you’re showing up confidently but your messaging is unclear, people won’t know what you offer or why they need it. If your messaging is clear but you’re too scared to share it, no one will see it. That’s why my coaching includes both: the mindset work to help you show up boldly AND the copy feedback to make sure your words actually sell.
How long does it take to stop feeling weird about self-promotion?
It depends, everyone is unique. If you’re posting once a month and spinning your wheels every time, it’ll take a while. If you’re showing up consistently (even when it’s uncomfortable), you’ll start feeling more natural within a few weeks. The key is repetition and getting out of the story that it is hard. The more you do it, the less your brain sees it as a threat.
Do I need therapy or can coaching actually help with this?
Coaching helps when you need real-time support to take action. If promoting yourself brings up deeper trauma or anxiety that’s affecting your daily life, therapy might be a better fit. In that case, I recommend seeking help from a qualified professional who has authority in their field.
But if you just need someone to help you push through the fear, call out the stories you’re telling yourself, and keep you moving forward, coaching works. Most of my clients don’t need therapy, they just need someone to support them, tell them they’re not being “too much” and to hit the “post” button anyway.
What’s the difference between confidence and arrogance when promoting myself?
Confidence is knowing what you’re good at and saying it clearly. Arrogance is thinking you’re better than everyone else and making people feel small.
During my coaching program, I also teach you how to make sure you don’t over talk about yourself but have a client-centered message.
If you’re worried about sounding arrogant, you’re probably not arrogant, because arrogant people don’t worry about that.
You’re just scared of being judged, which is normal. The solution isn’t to downplay what you do, it’s to own it without apologizing.
Will self-promotion ever feel natural, or will it always be hard?
It won’t always feel hard. Once you’ve done it enough times and seen that nothing terrible happens (and that people actually respond positively), your brain stops seeing it as dangerous. You’ll still have moments of doubt, but they won’t stop you anymore. That’s when it starts feeling natural and “normal”.
Want to learn more about working together?